Greetings from my couch! It is currently 2:30pm in the afternoon, though I could have swore it was much earlier than that. Unfortunately, multiple hours simply disappear when you are recovering from surgery. The medication knocks the living daylights out of you and even when you are awake you feel listless. At the moment, I am floating along on some oxycodone and an anti nausea med because the narcotics make me feel sick. This is good because my knee is in a contraption that constantly bends and straightens it in order to improve my range of motion. It is torturous enough process with the meds, so I am thankful for the cloudiness in my head at this point.
Recovery is slow work let me tell you, and it is made slower by the fact that the surgery was much more invasive than they expected. Contrary to popular belief, this is actually a good thing . If there was nothing to be done, the docs would have kept it purely arthroscopic and cleared out all the debris. My knee would have had a lot less cartilage as a result and I would likely need more surgery down the road. Thankfully, they saw that they could fix most of my kneecap , so they popped it out (literally!) and rebuilt its support. Thus, I have a much stiffer recovery ahead but my knee should be almost normal in a few months.
Throughout this process, I have continued to learn about the perspective of the care receiver (read my last post to see where I am coming from). Lately though, I keep getting drawn back to a comment I received after I preached on "Bondage to Sin" during Lent. In that sermon I reflected on how sin acts like a slave master, which forces you to act according to its mandates (see Romans 8, where Paul explains the concept pretty well). I used multiple illustrations to explain it, primarily broken relationships and how it is easier to make them worse instead of seeking forgiveness to resolve them. I always thought of sinful bondage as a social/spiritual malady. However, as I was shaking hands afterward, a little old woman came up to me. She was a frail, bent little person, but she spoke with a very clear voice. She told me "I realized how I am being kept in bondage. It is my rheumatoid arthritis that keeps me from living my life and I need to trust that God will free me."
Recovery is slow work let me tell you, and it is made slower by the fact that the surgery was much more invasive than they expected. Contrary to popular belief, this is actually a good thing . If there was nothing to be done, the docs would have kept it purely arthroscopic and cleared out all the debris. My knee would have had a lot less cartilage as a result and I would likely need more surgery down the road. Thankfully, they saw that they could fix most of my kneecap , so they popped it out (literally!) and rebuilt its support. Thus, I have a much stiffer recovery ahead but my knee should be almost normal in a few months.
Throughout this process, I have continued to learn about the perspective of the care receiver (read my last post to see where I am coming from). Lately though, I keep getting drawn back to a comment I received after I preached on "Bondage to Sin" during Lent. In that sermon I reflected on how sin acts like a slave master, which forces you to act according to its mandates (see Romans 8, where Paul explains the concept pretty well). I used multiple illustrations to explain it, primarily broken relationships and how it is easier to make them worse instead of seeking forgiveness to resolve them. I always thought of sinful bondage as a social/spiritual malady. However, as I was shaking hands afterward, a little old woman came up to me. She was a frail, bent little person, but she spoke with a very clear voice. She told me "I realized how I am being kept in bondage. It is my rheumatoid arthritis that keeps me from living my life and I need to trust that God will free me."
It was a fascinating statement. Granted, the relation between pain and sin deserves its own analysis. It is probably a deep topic, however, from my limited experiences, she seems to be on to something. There is a relationship there. When you are sick or in pain, that situation becomes the slave master. It dictates your schedule. You work when it allows you to and even then it focuses your efforts on itself. For example, I would like nothing more than to catch up on the ever growing pile of church paperwork, but it seems like whenever I really get going my pain meds set in. Or I get derailed because I have to spend some quality time with my bending machine. Yes, this pain does control me, and it frustrates me to no end. Thankfully, I know that it will not last forever. I will be back to normal soon (well, hopefully).
Still, my parishioner is right. Even though her situation is much different and more intense than mine, God offers us both freedom. That freedom is in the form of hope and the knowledge that the pain is not forever. Or as Psalmist tells us "Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning," (Psalm 30:5 NLT). Remembering this will help slacken the hold of the slave master and return control of your soul to the proper owner. So where can God free you today? What pain are you harboring that God could help you address? Gotta go, pain meds are setting in again and I am worried I will start writing verses from Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon." Thanks for all the prayers and support. As for now, its time to fly away . . . (Wheeeee).
